its not stalking. its research.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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