That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I can't put those talents on a resume
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Let's get the cat blown out
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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