my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
