i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
