i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i wish my penis had a tongue
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
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