Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize