Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
