Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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