So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
