So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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