Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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