Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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