We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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