Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
