All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
NoShamevember. You game?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
