yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
