So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
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