Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
