I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
