Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
