I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Randomize