that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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