Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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