Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
