people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize
