the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
sex in a hospital.. check
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
