Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
