For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
