just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
