Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
