Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Randomize
