yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
