He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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