ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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