fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
