Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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