And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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