real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize