if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
