Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Randomize
