i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
She needs sedatives and a leash
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
