also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
