spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
