my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
