Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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