That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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