we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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