i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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