I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize