The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
