you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
